I haven't talked about the diet lately because lately there's been no diet. I've gained back a few pounds, and I'm trying not to be demoralized and I'm trying to balance eating for pleasure and just eating. If that makes sense. I'm also going to have make more of an effort to work out, which means that I'm starting a work-out calendar on my fridge, to prod me into the gym or onto the streets at least five times a week. (I'm nurturing what might be a futile hope that when S and I move the city, my sister will consent to us being running partners. I hope she can try to see that it might be good for our motivations, and think it's a good idea. No clue if she will. Hey Kate! Don't dismiss the idea offhand, okay?)
The eating has been, though, the absolute problem. I'm sick of every single thing that you can possibly bring for lunch, and the only things near me that are somewhat do-able for lunch are Subway and Roly Poly, and I'm sick of those too. So I end up either getting something bad for me, or coming home and trying to make the hellish lunch a memory by splurging on a snack I absolutely should not be eating. I need to find a better compromise, but I'm having a hell of a time. (It doesn't help that I absolutely hate hate hate eating in the lunchroom with the er, other persons that eat in the lunchroom at noon. So I absolutely don't want to bring something that has to be microwaved, because then I have to go down there and cook it, and walk out, like some sort of asshole.)
I know, I'm just bitching. But part of me hopes that this public bitching will help me get more on track for where I want to be. Which is slightly more comfortable with my weight. Of course, it doesn't help/hurt that I have to be in a wedding in June, which is making me panic about looking good (because yes, I'm stupid), and also making me feel like I might be motivated. Might be is the key phrase.
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