10 Reasons why I'm Half Hipster

1. I'm a music snob.  But only sort of.  Becasue I love Dave Matthews and that's just not cool to those hipster snobs.
2. I like retro prints when it comes to clothing.  But I refuse to wear thrifted clothing, for many reasons that I will not expound upon here.  Thus, I cannot be a true hipster. 
3. I drive a German car.  So not hipster.  But I want a hybrid.  Hipster.
4. I use a Mac.  But I like to play non-cool computer games on it, like RollerCoaster Tycoon.  Also, I don't like any games where people shoot each other.  I suspect that's not cool.
5. I'm not a vegan.  Or a vegetarian.  Too many good foods come in meaty packages.  I accept that vegetarian can be good (my chosen Indian menu is exclusively vegetarian), but there's too many other good meaty foods.
6. I'm a pop-culture whore.  But apparently not for the right pop culture, because I like romance novels in a non-ironic way.
7. I love gay men, just like every hipster girl should.  But I currently don't have a gay boyfriend, to my eternal sadness.
8. I live in the suburbs.  Not cool.  And hopefully not for long.
9. I don't drink.  Or, rarely, anyway.  As such, I have no opinion whatsoever on drinks.  I like Bloody Marys and Amaretto Stone Sours.  No retro drinks for me.  Or cosmos or martinis or whatever.
10. I no longer smoke.  The chief hipster past-time is smoking too many cigarettes while drinking beer or coffee and showing disdain for the entire world.  Disdain I can do.  Cigs, beer and coffee?  Not so much.

Comments

[Tim]

You're like one tenth hipster, max.